Just this week Michael asked me, "Honey, do you ever slow down? Even when you sleep you breath heavy and you twitch all over the place." To his what seemed like an innocent question I answered very simply, "No." I laughed it off and that got me thinking... do I ever slow down? I know that my body shuts down or hits a wall around nine or ten at night but do I actually slow down when that happens... no! Even my dreams are fast paced and sporadic. Tonight is one of those nights where sleep eluded me for some time and once it did find me it did not knock me out but just came in the form of a four hour power nap and now here I sit. All the boys in the house are sound asleep and here I am tapping away on the computer. Sure I would like to be sleeping warm and snug in my bed but after forty five minutes of tossing and turning trying to find sleep again I realized that I was fighting a loosing battle, the more I moved the more things I started thinking about, the more things I started thinking about the less I thought about sleeping and the more I thought about just getting up and starting my day. Geesh!
Michael's question has rumbled around in my head for the last few days and his solution was visualization. He said that he can slow his heart rate down and thus decreasing this breathing and allowing himself to shut down parts of his body and mind. My thought is... maybe that is a guy thing? I have never been able to slow down, I just go and go until I hit a wall of exhaustion and I get the sleep that I need and then I am back up and doing it all over again the next day... same stuff just a different day. I am not sure if I have only been like this since becoming a wife and mom, as that season seems to have taken over all of my existence at times, or if I have just always been this way?
So here is to December 2nd at 3:30am! I minds as well start it out now rather than lay in bed in frustration.